A Mindset for Wisdom
Spiritual Discernment, Part 1
“It cannot be overstated how essential the cultivation of attitude is to having a successful journey on the spiritual path.”
Mariana Caplan
Spiritual Discernment Defined
Since the launch of this newsletter in June, I’ve mentioned the importance of spiritual discernment several times. You may have wondered what I was talking about or why it matters. Out of curiosity, I recently conducted an online search for the topic and found (surprisingly) a fairly decent AI-generated definition for the term:
Spiritual discernment is the ability to make wise judgments about spiritual matters, based on sound reasoning and understanding. It involves paying attention to the wisdom that God speaks to us through scripture, nature, people, and events.
Substitute your own terms for “God” and “scripture” if you’d like, but the key phrase I want to highlight is “the ability to make wise judgments about spiritual matters”.
If you were to conduct your own online search for the topic, you might find this definition plus many links to tradition-specific sites containing their own ways of defining and nurturing this ability. Since An Uncharted Path is aimed at spiritually independent persons, with and without religious affiliations, what I’ll present within the context of this and the next several posts will be broader-based and aimed at everyday applications.
On a Personal Note
As I reflect on my earlier life, I wish I had known then what I know now about discernment. In hindsight, what probably saved me from some of the spiritual and religious rabbit holes I was in danger of falling into was my lack of an early, misguided loyalty or attachment to a specific tradition of origin. I’m thinking of the unhealthiest of those, which could have led to indoctrination, something from which I’ve witnessed a fair number of people struggle to break free.
What also likely helped was the fact that I had strong intuitive abilities from an early age. Honing one’s intuition is one component of developing strong spiritual discernment (and a topic we’ll explore in a later post). I had a general sense of when something felt “off” or was simply not a good match for me. The flip side of that, however, is that I sometimes found myself in a flavor of religiosity or spirituality that I ultimately realized wasn’t aligned well with my beliefs or values, but from which I had difficulty letting go once I’d settled into it. A better working knowledge of spiritual discernment would have helped.
I’ve certainly made progress in that regard, but I’m now committed to the continual bolstering of my spiritual discernment as a lifelong endeavor. I feel it’s that important.
A Foundation for Discernment: Twelve Key Attitudes
As I completed my training to become a spiritual director (a.k.a. companion, guide, coach, or mentor), I was introduced to what would become my favorite book about spiritual discernment: Eyes Wide Open: Cultivating Discernment on the Spiritual Path. The book’s author, Mariana Caplan, has spent multiple decades researching and applying the knowledge gleaned from many of the world’s mystical traditions. She is currently a psychotherapist, consultant, and the author of several books in the fields of psychology and spirituality.
In Eyes Wide Open, Caplan offers twelve mental attitudes that serve to strengthen one’s ability to discern well, to skillfully apply spiritual wisdom to life situations with greater clarity and less confusion. The ongoing cultivation of these mental postures -- in a focused, consistent way -- naturally leads to better discernment. And wise discernment brings with it a greater potential for well-being and for a higher quality of life. I would also add a greater chance of discovering your unique ways to serve the human collective.
The individual attitudes Caplan outlines are listed below, each followed by a quote from the book that gives the gist and relevance of the attitude to one’s spiritual life. As we develop and strengthen these qualities within ourselves, we create the spiritual bricks that form a foundation on which our best discernment rests.
1. Sincerity of Intention
“To transform one’s mind – to radically surrender control of one’s limited self and allow something greater to be discovered – is one of the most difficult and frightening things a human being can do. And it is the ultimate requirement of any authentic spiritual path.”
2. Compassion
“We have a built-in human tendency toward self-centeredness, even if our ‘self’ includes our children, family, and close friends. True compassion is learned through practice, experience, devotion, love, and heartbreak. It cannot be imitated or role-played.”
3. Vulnerability and Openness
“From the perspective of transformation, nothing can happen until we decide that we wish to open.”
4. Patience
“For those who aspire to authentic spiritual wisdom, there is no quick fix, and those who believe there is will eventually have to make peace with the fact that spiritual integration requires a lifetime of work. The path is going to take its own sweet time.”
5. Equanimity
“Equanimity is the capacity to remain emotionally steady regardless of circumstances…. We must gradually learn not to take all of life personally, either as a reward when things go our way or as a punishment when they do not.”
6. Responsiveness
“Our own journey is unique and highly unpredictable, and if we do not cultivate flexibility and willingness to respond to changing circumstances, we will get stuck.”
7. Passion
“Spiritual life is not always pleasant. Often, in fact, it is not, but it is our deep passion and conviction – as well as the joy we find in life – that sustains us through its challenges.”
8. Relaxation
“The capacity to relax under stress, which is most often learned than innate, is a vital attitude to be cultivated on the path.”
9. Contentment
“We learn to gracefully receive what life gives us, rather than demand that life should always give us what we want. Such contentment is a mood of gratitude.”
10. Sense of Humor
“A sense of humor is necessary to make the trials of transformation bearable, and it is also a valuable transformational tool. When we are laughing, our defenses are down, and we are receptive and permeable to the inflow of grace, transmission, and energy.”
11. Wonder and Openness to Magic
“[Wonder] comes through paying attention to detail, valuing small things, and appreciating the flickering moment of time that is our lives. It is not easy to open to magic and wonder, but opening precedes perception.”
12. Humility
“Distinct from the imitation humility that is so commonly pedaled in spiritual scenes, the true recognition that ‘I know that I do not know’ allows us to stay open to the learning that the life process continually makes available to us.”
As you reflect on each attitude above, do you feel it is a strong aspect of your current mindset -- or an area worth strengthening?
Final Thoughts
In recent times, I’ve brought Caplan’s list of attitudes off my shelf of “good ideas” and into the actual living of my life. Each year, I’ve annually chosen one or two of the mental postures to develop or strengthen, especially as they apply to areas of life that are important to me.
For example, 2024 was my “year of vulnerability”. The launch of this newsletter was one part of that. I knew that what I had to say might meet with disinterest or disapproval, but I decided to take the risks anyway.
It became part of my spiritual work over many months. If I was to expand my reach, and if my words could bring value for at least one person each time I posted, I needed to muster the willingness to open to all possibilities -- to approach the endeavor with a sense of equanimity.
As the new year unfolds, I encourage you to do the same. Instead of resolutions, choose one or two of the attitudes above for focus during 2025. As these attitudes strengthen within you, notice the ways your life expands. Notice how the quality of your discernments creates impact within yourself and on behalf of others.
My heartfelt wish is that it may be so.
Until next time,
Anna